It's a girl, the doctor told me!
I couldnâ??t believe it, it seemed very strange to me, it was what I wanted, a girl, a sister and a friend to me. That night I didnâ??t sleep at all, I imagined every moment with you.
Before I was born, I felt sad and looking forward to it, and even when I was told that everything would change with the arrival of a child, I did not believe that this would happen completely.
You changed my feelings, made me more sensitive and ready than ever to cope with any situation in life.
When I first held you in my chest, I cried. In those moments I donâ??t know why, because I was in pain? Because my dream came true? Because my fear ended there? Or because it was normal to cry.
You, such a small man, have changed my world, my small but already big world with you in my heart and soul.
You taught me how to be patient, you taught me that the only sacrifice worthwhile is for you and to be rewarded with a smile, a hug and a sweet word.
I like your face and when you get nervous and cry, when you tell me "mom why do you look at me like that", but I can't explain why I look like that, when you grow up I will tell them all, because there are many reasons to which only mothers understand.
This month for me, has been the most beautiful and happy month along these years with you on your side.
I enjoyed you, enjoyed you, surprised you to the point of longing. I had lost a lot of things from you.
Every night after I go to sleep, I caress and kiss you and stay with you there for a few minutes.
You are Me and I am made of you because you chose me to be your mother.
I like your world, when you think you're a princess, when she asks me to play closet steps and she tells me where you're going to hide, when we cook together, I get involved with you too, because your world is clean and I want to make it possible until to have power.
Mindful moments of my childhood come to my mind when I see you, I try to fully understand you, not to hurt you and to leave the right space respecting you, sometimes even to say more the words "forgive me" and "please" , only for you to understand their importance.
At first I could hardly wait for you to grow up a little faster because you seemed too small for me, I wanted you to talk and have fun calling me all day, walking around the house making a mess and running with me but I was still very much exalted and I didnâ??t realize then that time would pass so quickly even that one day I would regret it.
While now there are many days of my life, I think "if I had the opportunity to put you back in my belly, to keep you there and not to worry so much about you", but here lies the beauty of motherhood, which you try the most great which we have to pass on successfully and lovingly fulfilling our duty with dignity.
My world is beautiful only by entering your world!
PS: Silvi Boçi is an accountant by profession, but for some time now she has been creating a blog of her own on IG, all over Albania. She explains the reasons that led her: â??After becoming a mother I discovered a world different from the one I lived in before and seeing the difficulties I encountered more and more, I thought of opening a page on Instagram where I give advice, post translations about recipes and health advice, post my current writings related to current affairs, and do sleep training with mothers who need it. Of course, the site requires a lot of commitment and reading from reliable sources, but when you have passion, everything goes well.
