Oscar Wilde once said that "some people bring joy wherever they go, while others bring joy as soon as they leave."

The difference between these two types of people mainly depends on psychological traits, ranging from emotional stability, emotional intelligence, social skills, or even just behavioral norms.

Contextual factors, such as organizational culture, team dynamics, and other people, also matter. This is why the same individual may behave well in some circumstances, but exhibit toxic behavior in other circumstances.

Fatkeqësisht, mirësjellja nuk shpërblehet gjithmonë. Siç thotë Jeffrey Pfeffer në librin e tij mbi fuqinë, ngrohtësia dhe mirësia shpesh interpretohen si shenja dobësie, sidomos nëse nuk i keni shfaqur ende kompetencat tuaja.

Sikur të mos mjaftonte kjo, individët narcisistë shpesh arrijnë të ngjiten në majën e hierarkisë organizative, duke përfituar nga ndershmëria dhe integriteti i njerëzve të tjerë dhe duke ?uar kështu përpara interesat e tyre në kurriz të sistemit, njësoj si parazitët.

E megjithatë, në planin afatgjatë, reputacioni ynë varet më së shumti nga mënyra se si trajtojmë të tjerët, veçanërisht kur nuk kemi ndonjë nevojë për t’u treguar domosdoshmërisht të sjellshëm. Qytetaria organizative është një përbërës kyç i performancës suaj në punë dhe të qenit i aftë në krijimin e marrëdhënieve me të tjerët është një faktor shumë i rëndësishëm për vlerësimin që do të merrni nga shefi juaj.

Edhe pse nuk janë të shumta organizatat që përfshijnë zyrtarisht përshtypjet e kolegëve në vlerësimet formale të performancës, do të ishte e logjikshme që kjo iniciativë të ndërmerrej nga më shumë kompani. Mendimet që kanë kolegët paraqesin një pamje profesionale tonën më të saktë sesa mendimet e menaxherit.

Regardless of your style and personality, there is always room to improve your behavior at work. Here are some simple recommendations suggested by science:

Listen more:  As a recent academic study shows, the more you listen, the more others trust and like you.

Listening also increases your effectiveness as a leader and others' perception of your character as a leader. It's quite simple to improve your listening skills: just be quiet and pay attention to what others are saying.

Improve others:  The best leaders are also often great coaches. The same applies to colleagues and employees.

If you try to understand others and do what you can to improve their performance and help them fulfill their potential, they will value you more and, thus, you will bring out see your leadership skills.

Avoid superficial or fake reviews:  Although reviews can be very effective, they must be perceived as genuine. In other words, regardless of whether you're telling the truth or not, you need to be perceived as "authentic" by others, or these assessments won't yield the right results.

As Irwin Goffman points out in his essay on the subject, "If you have paid a person a compliment or shown him some special appreciation, you should not demonstrate the same behavior to any other person in his presence."

Avoid unnecessary arguments:  This may be easy to understand, but arguments are one of the main sources of conflict in the workplace and the main factor that undermines team effectiveness and group cooperation. In general, it makes people feel better to be right than to be nice, but there's no reason why these two things shouldn't go hand in hand.

As Dale Carnegie said, "the only way to win an argument is to avoid it." Although there is a certain level of conflict that is considered healthy, in cases where it is moderate and meaningful, it is advisable to choose your battles wisely.

Be more tolerant:  Although empathy, the ability to see things from other people's perspectives and care about them, is often associated with kindness in the workplace, it is certainly not enough.

Note that the combined share of empathy and prosocial behavior is only about 9%, and you don't need to have an emotional connection to someone to treat them better and show rational kindness. / Fast Company