Often, the presence of anxiety during sexual intercourse prevents the experience of orgasm – even when it is not explicitly stated. This condition, called “orgasmic anxiety”, manifests itself with body tension, mental detachment from the moment, a feeling of fear of the climax of the act and the distraction of the mind from this position.
1. Discover the source of anxiety
To address anxiety, it is important to reflect on:
Is there pressure or expectation from your partner for you to experience orgasm?
Do you have negative or traumatic past experiences related to sex?
Do you feel uncomfortable with the position, angle, or type of sexual activity?
By identifying the origin (pressure, shock, inability to relax), a strategy can be built that addresses the problem from the root.
2. Communication and creating the right environment
Talk openly with your partner about your feelings and needs without shame. Together, create a safe and relaxing space – quiet, with soft music, warm lighting or rituals before you begin. This helps the body and mind move from tension to calmness.
3. Body exploration and masturbation
Taking the time to get to know yourself – how to touch yourself, what stimulation works for you – is key to understanding what leaves you relaxed and satisfied. This can be done both solo and with a partner, in spaces that don't have expectations of orgasm.
4. Taking the focus off orgasm
A key point: sex is not defined by the escape of orgasm. Shift the focus to sensations, touch, and emotional intimacy. The expectation that you “must climax” often fuels anxiety and hinders the freedom of experience.
5. Professional help if needed
If personal efforts do not yield improvement, consulting with a sex educator or therapist is a valuable resource for specialized strategies and emotional support.
Photo by Nataliya Vaitkevich: https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-holding-sliced-orange-fruit-5187882/
